The start of something new

God wants you to know... that the life you are having is the life you are creating. Even when this seems paradoxical on the surface, how could you possibly want anything but happiness, on a deeper level, there is something in you that is make it so. To transform  your life you must first understand what is keeping it the way it is.

God wants you to know that it is also important to know what you do not want. Sometimes when you go through a period of great difficulty and struggle, it is so that you can finally realize what you do NOT want in your life. Then finally, at long last, you can embrace what you DO want.
^That is exactly what I posted about last night.

This morning I got up and went to Iron Pump! I had not been to Iron Pump in 4 months :-o I thought I was going to DIE.... but once class got going it turned out not to be as killer as I had anticipated.  

Don't get me wrong, it was definitely a challenge, but I was stronger than I thought.  I loaded my bar and got be DBs and at the time they seemed heavy, but once we started, I definitely could have gone up on my weights! :D  When I wanted to quit because Angela was doing a killer shoulder workout today... all I could think about was "this is worth it,  you are strong, and this is what you want" =)

Those endorphins have definitely kicked in!  I am pumped!  And it is a BEAUTIFUL day outside!  Life is good at the moment.


I love watching Sydney lay on the back of the couch and look out the window :)

Regrets, lessons learned, or hidden opportunities?

God has you where you are for a reason. He has a purpose for you being there.

You've got to take some chances, you've got to be willing to risk losing it all. Sometimes all you can do is close your eyes and leap because it might be worth the fall.I took that leap of faith, but when I hit the ledge, it broke. I gave it all up...a steady job and income... for what I thought was going to be better. In some ways it was better, in others not so much.


But what have I learned from this experience?
I learned what my passion is not.  I'm trying to see this as a way out of what I do not enjoy. It's not how I wished for it happen, but I cannot change that. I have to play the cards I've been dealt and do the best I can.

You only ever grow as a person when you are outside your comfort zone.

This is way outside my comfort zone because I like to be in control and things be steady, but I am currently on a rocky and windy road....

What God is showing me through all of this is...
      Faith and trust in Him for sure!

      And I think He is ready for me to stop running from my fears and begin to face them & start fighting for what I really want!

One way that I have to stop running from my fears is... someone asked me if I could train them! :-o I have no clue what I am doing but it's time to learn. 

*I have enough $ to purchase the study materials for the certification :-o It's freaking me out a little... okay a lot! The program and bundle that I am buying includes an exam voucher good for one-year... so next year this time I will definitely be certified! How exciting! :D

I am ready to change and turn my life around.  I read an article the other that my amazing friend Melanie was interviewed for and it has motivated me to get healthy.  Over the next few months I going to be cleaning the entire house... I'm excited to get to the kitchen part of this cleaning adventure... I'm taking out all the bad and replacing with all the good! :) I'm also in the cooking mood and trying to new foods. (Please share any healthy recipes please!)

It's time to be an example and live the lifestyle I am trying to get others to live as well.

A quote I came across this morning, "Sometimes things in life turn out differently then what we planned, but that is just our path changing because we have changed."

Although things are most definitely not as I had planned.... It is going to turn out way better. It's time to get ready because it's coming fast!

So, do I consider this situation in my life a regret, a lesson learned or a hidden opportunity...

-Well it started out as regret. Up until this afternoon I regretted my decision for leaving TMF.

 -Then it turned into a lesson learned.  The lesson being, don't leave something good, just because you want out for something "better" that you still have an uneasy feeling about... but if I didn't take the new job I would have always wondered what-if...

-And now it has become a hidden opportunity because if I had stayed at TMF, I would have continued to put off getting my certification.

Full of emotions

I heard someone say once, "fake it 'til you make it."  My question is... what do you do when you are tired of "faking it," but you haven't "made it" yet?

Today has been full of emotions... stress, anger, annoyance, joy, excitement and anxiety.

Work is explained by the first three emotions.  

Driving to the gym this afternoon I was a bit nervous, because I haven't worked out at the gym all summer.  I was in the middle of my workout on the elliptical and all I could do is smile!  I only did 30 minutes at a slow speed, but it's the beginning of something amazing!  I have a long journey ahead of me... but I think this time it's really going to happen.  *PRAY that it DOES happen this time!! Pray that I do NOT get lazy and apathetic!*

After I came home from the gym I began looking up other companies for my certification.  I think I know who I am going to get my certification from, at least to start off with.  I am so excited to get started studying and everything, but I am so nervous and anxious about the exam and everything that I will forget everything and fail.

Be Strong.

I wrote this about 2 weeks ago...
God has you where you are for a reason.  He has a purpose for you being there.  When that purpose is completed He will move you to the next place that He needs you.  But how do you know you are the place you should be?  How do you know you didn't make a mistake?

God wouldn't have opened this door and it peak my interest if there was not a reason behind it. I wouldn't have taken this job if I didn't think it was going to be a good thing.  I have been there for 2 weeks and it's not what I expected at all.  But there has to be a purpose for me there!

So, why does it hurt so bad to think about saying goodbye to TMF?!  As much as I complained about my job at TMF and how much I wanted out... That's not the case anymore.  I have cried more tears in the last few weeks/days then in a looong time!  And I know it's only going to get harder as these next 2 weeks pass and my days come to an end.


And this is from today....
Well, those 2 weeks have come and end tomorrow.  Tomorrow is my last day at TMF.  I have SO many mixed emotions.  I was doing okay until I left work tonight & realized that was going to be the last time I saw some of those kids.  I hate goodbyes... they are the hardest thing for me!  How do you say goodbye to your family?  Yes, I know they are only 30 minutes away, but it's never going to be the same again.  I miss them, and I haven't even left yet.

I keep thinking about the "what-ifs."  What if I had never seen people posting about XTC on facebook... What if I had not taken vacation that week and heard people talking about the kickboxing class there and the new building and childcare...  What if I had never applied for a job there... What if I had never gotten an interview, but less a job offer... What ifs.. I may never know the answer.  Would I be happy staying at TMF?  Maybe, maybe not.  What I do know is there are some VERY special people there that I am leaving behind! :'(  I wish I could take them all with me, but I can't.  I have to stop thinking about the "what-ifs" and start thinking about the "what-is" now.

None of those kids at TMF will ever remember who I am, but I know I will never forget them and how much they have impacted my life!!


God has a plan.  He has a purpose for me.  I just have to trust that.  Although it's going to be extremely hard tomorrow... God has something amazing He wants to do with my life and I don't think it was going to happen with me staying where I was comfortable.

Being strong doesn't mean you don't cry yourself to sleep.  

It means holding yourself together and doing what needs to be done.  

And trusting that the Lord has great things ahead for you!

My life has been forever change because of the people I have met in the last year!!  Lindale has some very amazing people that I am thankful that I have been able to be apart of their lives.